Having said that, they really should get Wurst to do the next Bond theme.
So on with A View To A Kill, a film which caused a faint bleached sadness to consume me. At this point, the producers were desperate to try to make Bond feel up to date and relevant (without spending any more money) while realizing that nostalgia was the main reason people still watched them. The result is a plastic eighties gloss that has dated very badly. Blacklight and Spandau Ballet were both lucky to get fifteen minutes of fame before everyone realized that both were serious migraine triggers. Why did the mysterious forces of pop-culture insist that a women needed to be at least 20% hair to be an acceptable heroine? It was a strange time and the worst is that we're moving into an era that I dimly remember but can't quite believe I actually experienced. Because real people never actually look like the ones on film, the eighties is one of the few periods in which reality actually looked better. Still I can't see the bubble perm making a comeback.
Remembering that recruiting cast members from The Avengers had worked well for them before, they got Patrick Macnee in a supporting role, presumably to find someone who looked even more past it than their star. This may have backfired a little as he contributes to the feeling of better days past they were trying to avoid and he seems enthusiastic. Which is a lot more than could be said for Roger Moore who apparently hated the film, hated being older than his leading lady's mother and is visibly scared of Grace Jones during their sex scene together. Grace Jones is pretty much the film's sole virtue. Her line readings are terrible but so is the dialogue and she's always enjoyable to watch. She and Christopher Walken are superhuman but sociopathic products of a Nazi breeding experiment to create uber-babies by injecting pregnant mothers with vast amounts of steroids (no, this would not work). He has a plan involving a microchip that's been hardened against the Russians setting off an EMP pulse (pay attention, this plot point will recur in later films) and flooding Silicon Valley to get a monopoly on said microchips. This feels like a bit of a comedown, what happened to the crazed villains who wanted to destroy the world?
Almost everyone in the film looks tired, grumpy and like they just wanted to get it over with (as indeed do I). I shall cheer myself up by looking at photos of the spectacular hotness of young Christopher Walken before moving on.
|Grace Jones' career as an aerobics instructor reaches it's inevitable conclusion.|